Building Resiliency in Children, One Interaction at a Time
By Fawn Davies, Communications Director
Permanency workers have a powerful opportunity to help build resilience in the children and youth they serve—one interaction at a time. During the SWAN/IL Spring Quarterly Meetings held throughout April, the SWAN network explored what resilience is, why it matters, and how caseworkers can help foster it in everyday moments.
Program Technical Assistant Kristine Kline, who delivered the morning general session, shared Dr. Ann Masten’s concept of “ordinary magic,” that is the everyday, seemingly small interactions that can support a child's ability to bounce back from challenges.
Take, for example, the simple act of a parent displaying a child’s artwork on the refrigerator. This small gesture affirms the child’s worth, reinforces their self-esteem, acknowledges their accomplishments, and supports their sense of capability. While children who have experienced complex trauma and foster care often need therapeutic services, many everyday actions that promote resilience require no money and little time—and their impact grows when offered consistently.
Kristine used a powerful metaphor to illustrate the impact of adversity: imagine a child moving through a cafeteria line holding a flimsy Styrofoam plate. With each scoop of adversity added, the plate gets heavier until, eventually, it breaks. While we can't eliminate every challenge children in care face, we can help reinforce their ability to carry the load. Supporting resilience is like offering an extra plate beneath the first—strengthening their foundation and helping them withstand more weight.
Resilience comes from three key sources:
- External supports and resources ("I have…")
Helping children recognize the people and resources they can count on—those who love them, set healthy boundaries, model positive behavior, support their learning, and provide care when needed—reinforces a sense of safety and connection. - Internal strengths ("I am…")
When children begin to see themselves as people who are loved, who enjoy helping others, who are respectful and responsible, and who believe that things can get better, their internal sense of identity and confidence grows. - Social and interpersonal skills ("I can…")
Planning is already a familiar part of child welfare—transition plans, permanency plans, visitation plans. But workers can also help children plan for their own emotional safety. When children can say, “I can talk to someone when I’m scared,” “I can solve problems,” “I can take steps to manage my emotions,” or “I can find help when I need it,” they begin to feel empowered and in control.
The more resources a child can identify, the more resilient they become. These resources often include supportive relationships, mindfulness strategies, positive role models, and a growth mindset. A full list of Ways to Build Resiliency in Children is available in the SWAN/IL Quarterly Meeting general session handout linked below.